Look up as I am closing door to see two passengers changing seats. Make announcement reminding people we are about to taxi and they need to sit down. They ignore me (as usual) So I have to go back and talk to them:
Sir, what is your original seat assignment?
Row 8 or 10 or something.
I'm sorry sir, the seats you moved to are economy plus. They cost extra and the agent offered upgrades so you're going to have to return to your original seat.
(as they are moving back to their seats) That's ridiculous. No one is sitting there. If I have to go back you better make that kid stop kicking my seat.
Did you say something to them already?
Doesn't matter, you HAVE to TELL him to stop.
Actually sir, I don't have to TELL him anything. But you need to fasten your seatbelt and stow your bags so we can get going. Thank you.
*ilovemyjobilovepeopleilovemyjob*
Monday, December 3
Sunday, August 5
Nonrev mania, we've all been there.
Nonrev plans are usually made the week before. If you book any earlier than that you won't have a real idea of how flights look. Flight loads are checked and re-checked. Routes are studied and more loads are checked. The night before the trip the standby list is dissected to determine how far down your name falls.
If flights get bad you look into alernate routes or you decide to stick it out and petition the nonrev gods to have pity on your travel plans. After all, as a nonrev your options aren't limitless. But sometimes they do require 'creative re-routing'.
You get up in the morning and check the list. You check the flight again once you check in. You become OCD with the standby list in one hand and your boarding pass in the other. Glancing around the boarding area you can see the others who are just like you. They have their eyes glued to the gate and jump at every name the agent calls. All of you are circling the ticket counter like a pack of hungry wolves. No one dares to get too close for fear of being reprimanded by the gate agent.
Finally the agent calls out the first name, then another. You try desperately to remember whose name was above yours on the list but you were so focused on your own name you weren't really paying attention. They call another name, and it's still not you.
There, was that your name? Did you just hear it? You rush up to the counter. Nonchalantly of course. After all, you were certain you would make this flight, there was never a doubt in your mind. You've got this nonreving thing down to a science.
If flights get bad you look into alernate routes or you decide to stick it out and petition the nonrev gods to have pity on your travel plans. After all, as a nonrev your options aren't limitless. But sometimes they do require 'creative re-routing'.
You get up in the morning and check the list. You check the flight again once you check in. You become OCD with the standby list in one hand and your boarding pass in the other. Glancing around the boarding area you can see the others who are just like you. They have their eyes glued to the gate and jump at every name the agent calls. All of you are circling the ticket counter like a pack of hungry wolves. No one dares to get too close for fear of being reprimanded by the gate agent.
Finally the agent calls out the first name, then another. You try desperately to remember whose name was above yours on the list but you were so focused on your own name you weren't really paying attention. They call another name, and it's still not you.
There, was that your name? Did you just hear it? You rush up to the counter. Nonchalantly of course. After all, you were certain you would make this flight, there was never a doubt in your mind. You've got this nonreving thing down to a science.
Revenue?
So far my revenue trip has been eventful. I had to check my rollaboard which has made me feel completely lost. Those of you who are crewmembers understand. There's something comforting in knowing you have control of your own luggage during a trip. That it isn't riding around on the tarmac under someone else's sometimes not so watchful eye. I keep glancing behind me looking for my 'rollie' and I have to remind myself it's in the belly of the plane. Definitely an odd feeling to be without it.
About an hour after takeoff the captain got on the PA and started talking in Japanese. I thought nothing of it until he kept talking & talking & talking. When he finally addressed the cabin in English he said those two dreaded words, 'bird strike'. We took off at 0615 and were informed of the situation at 8am. We had fueled up three and a half hour flight and ended up circling for three hours. I think he said we were burning fuel to safely land but I don't speak Japanese.
I'm amazed at how calm the passengers are acting. No one was unruly (that I could tell) The flight attendants kept their smiles and walked through the cabin answering questions. All in all they were stellar!
Landed back in Narita and are sitting on the tarmac on the buses waiting for maintenance to decide our fate. If only the passengers knew how often they are the ones who truly run the airline.
I'm just thankful the flight attendants are getting a break from the people. After all, they aren't getting paid for this now that the door is open.
About an hour after takeoff the captain got on the PA and started talking in Japanese. I thought nothing of it until he kept talking & talking & talking. When he finally addressed the cabin in English he said those two dreaded words, 'bird strike'. We took off at 0615 and were informed of the situation at 8am. We had fueled up three and a half hour flight and ended up circling for three hours. I think he said we were burning fuel to safely land but I don't speak Japanese.
I'm amazed at how calm the passengers are acting. No one was unruly (that I could tell) The flight attendants kept their smiles and walked through the cabin answering questions. All in all they were stellar!
Landed back in Narita and are sitting on the tarmac on the buses waiting for maintenance to decide our fate. If only the passengers knew how often they are the ones who truly run the airline.
I'm just thankful the flight attendants are getting a break from the people. After all, they aren't getting paid for this now that the door is open.
Thursday, July 19
Buddy up for passes!
Buddy passes are a big deal. We only have a few, and they are only good on certain airlines. Asking someone you just met or someone you never talk to for a buddy pass is not okay. Finding out someone you knew in high school is now flying and asking them for a buddy pass is ridiculous.
I guard these passes with my life because your behavior on my buddy pass is a direct reflection on me as an employee. I don't give them out to everyone. When I give someone a buddy pass it is because I trust them to realize a few things:
1. You have NO rights to a flight, or a seat, or anything else. Standby means IF there are seats left on the plane AND there aren't people ahead of you, you MIGHT get a seat. So if you need to get somewhere important, buy a 'real' seat. It's not worth the hassle.
2. There IS a dress code. No jeans, no sneakers, no shorts and definitely no swimsuits. Think business casual or imagine you are on your way to an interview. There is always a possibility you may sit in first class so dress accordingly.
3. Be accommodating. If the gate agent wants you to stand on the right side of the counter or sit down, listen. If the crew wants to re-seat you, just move. Most of the time you will get a better seat.
4. Be flexible. An earlier flight may cancel and your flight could fill up as soon as you get to the counter. Sometimes flying standby requires some creative flexibility. I've flown from Puerto Rico to Altlanta to San Francisco just to get to Salt Lake City. The point is, I made it there.
5. Always be nice to your crew. Bring them some candy from the duty-free. You'd be amazed how great a little candy can make your flight! And be sure to thank them, after all you are a guest on their aircraft.
6. Try not to tell the other passengers you're traveling standby. I was flying back from Japan and seated next to me was a nice young man who told the flight attendants and I that he was flying standby. The man across the aisle from us was irate because he had paid thousands of dollars to sit in first and supposedly we were served our drinks before him. (He wasn't a nice man at all) If he hadn't known we were standby travelers it probably would not have become an issue.
7. Always say thank you. To the agent for the seat, to the flight attendant for your drink, to the pilot for the ride. A little gratefulness goes a long way.
Lastly: If you are treated as the gate agents whipping boy/girl/person - smile and walk away. They have the seats, they control the flight, they are your airport GOD. Unfortunately sometimes they realize this and take out their frustrations on the nonrev travelers. If that happens just walk away calmly. There isn't much you can do about it.
My benefits hinge on your behavior. If you don't behave you must have enough money to cover my standby travel. Do you have an extra $4k a month to pay for my flights? I'm guessing you don't and that's why you need a buddy pass. Well, then that's exactly why I need you to behave...
Happy flying!
I guard these passes with my life because your behavior on my buddy pass is a direct reflection on me as an employee. I don't give them out to everyone. When I give someone a buddy pass it is because I trust them to realize a few things:
1. You have NO rights to a flight, or a seat, or anything else. Standby means IF there are seats left on the plane AND there aren't people ahead of you, you MIGHT get a seat. So if you need to get somewhere important, buy a 'real' seat. It's not worth the hassle.
2. There IS a dress code. No jeans, no sneakers, no shorts and definitely no swimsuits. Think business casual or imagine you are on your way to an interview. There is always a possibility you may sit in first class so dress accordingly.
3. Be accommodating. If the gate agent wants you to stand on the right side of the counter or sit down, listen. If the crew wants to re-seat you, just move. Most of the time you will get a better seat.
4. Be flexible. An earlier flight may cancel and your flight could fill up as soon as you get to the counter. Sometimes flying standby requires some creative flexibility. I've flown from Puerto Rico to Altlanta to San Francisco just to get to Salt Lake City. The point is, I made it there.
5. Always be nice to your crew. Bring them some candy from the duty-free. You'd be amazed how great a little candy can make your flight! And be sure to thank them, after all you are a guest on their aircraft.
6. Try not to tell the other passengers you're traveling standby. I was flying back from Japan and seated next to me was a nice young man who told the flight attendants and I that he was flying standby. The man across the aisle from us was irate because he had paid thousands of dollars to sit in first and supposedly we were served our drinks before him. (He wasn't a nice man at all) If he hadn't known we were standby travelers it probably would not have become an issue.
7. Always say thank you. To the agent for the seat, to the flight attendant for your drink, to the pilot for the ride. A little gratefulness goes a long way.
Lastly: If you are treated as the gate agents whipping boy/girl/person - smile and walk away. They have the seats, they control the flight, they are your airport GOD. Unfortunately sometimes they realize this and take out their frustrations on the nonrev travelers. If that happens just walk away calmly. There isn't much you can do about it.
My benefits hinge on your behavior. If you don't behave you must have enough money to cover my standby travel. Do you have an extra $4k a month to pay for my flights? I'm guessing you don't and that's why you need a buddy pass. Well, then that's exactly why I need you to behave...
Happy flying!
Friday, June 1
Conversation in the exit row...
Sir, you're sitting in my emergency exit row, are you willing & able to assist us in the event of an emergency?
- I do not speak English.
Ok, then we will need to move you. Please sit here instead.
- I want to sit 8A
No sir, I need you to take this seat.
- I do not like that seat.
Sir, just take this seat. We need to go.
- I do not want to sit there.
Too bad, sit down. Thank you!
...Later that day, on the very next flight...
Sir, you're sitting in my emergency exit row, are you willing & able to assist us in the event of an emergency?
- Huh?
I'm going to need to move you.
- I do not understand why I must move.
If we have an emergency will you be able to understand and follow my instructions?
- Huh?
Exactly. Please take this seat here. Thank you!
- I do not speak English.
Ok, then we will need to move you. Please sit here instead.
- I want to sit 8A
No sir, I need you to take this seat.
- I do not like that seat.
Sir, just take this seat. We need to go.
- I do not want to sit there.
Too bad, sit down. Thank you!
...Later that day, on the very next flight...
Sir, you're sitting in my emergency exit row, are you willing & able to assist us in the event of an emergency?
- Huh?
I'm going to need to move you.
- I do not understand why I must move.
If we have an emergency will you be able to understand and follow my instructions?
- Huh?
Exactly. Please take this seat here. Thank you!
Wednesday, May 30
Stronger than a seatbelt?
I get it, you have no control over your child. They run your house. You buy them candy and toys and wrap your paycheck around their every whim. Or maybe you don't spoil them and they are the best behaved child in the world. Onboard the plane you must be the parent, and that means following the rules.
I am tired of repeating over and over and over again that your child over 2 years old must be in THEIR OWN SEATBELT. You are not stronger than a seatbelt. Your arms will not be able to hold your child when we hit wake turbulence. You can not keep a child in your lap if the plane stops suddenly. Your child will become a 'meat bullet' and fly into someone else and injure them. There are other planes taxiing around us. The airport has lots of traffic. We can't see clear air turbulence and it can cause major injuries. The seatbelt sign is on for a reason.Please obey it.
Just put the child into the seat and buckle the belt. Hold your hand over the buckle so they can't undo it. Yes, they may cry. Yes, they may scream. They may even throw a huge temper tantrum. But they will be safe and that is what really matters.
I really don't want to keep telling you this but I am required to by law. Part of my job is to make sure you're safe even though you seem not to care. I can't afford a fine from the FAA. Really, if I wasn't responsible for your life you could do whatever you wanted. But I am responsible. So buckle up please.
I am tired of repeating over and over and over again that your child over 2 years old must be in THEIR OWN SEATBELT. You are not stronger than a seatbelt. Your arms will not be able to hold your child when we hit wake turbulence. You can not keep a child in your lap if the plane stops suddenly. Your child will become a 'meat bullet' and fly into someone else and injure them. There are other planes taxiing around us. The airport has lots of traffic. We can't see clear air turbulence and it can cause major injuries. The seatbelt sign is on for a reason.Please obey it.
Just put the child into the seat and buckle the belt. Hold your hand over the buckle so they can't undo it. Yes, they may cry. Yes, they may scream. They may even throw a huge temper tantrum. But they will be safe and that is what really matters.
I really don't want to keep telling you this but I am required to by law. Part of my job is to make sure you're safe even though you seem not to care. I can't afford a fine from the FAA. Really, if I wasn't responsible for your life you could do whatever you wanted. But I am responsible. So buckle up please.
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